White Lies

Why oh why do we lie? Are there benefits to lying or are all lies wrong? Am I right in saying that we should never ever lie? I think that’s what the general consensus is, right?

So if we all live our lives without once telling a lie then we will all live in peace and harmony right? No!! Wrong!!! There are so many scenarios where lying is a must!! In fact, it would be considered wrong not to lie!! “What’s this crazy Englishman talking about?” you may say? Well, let me run a few scenarios by you and see what you think


What if you’re at a friend’s house for dinner and the food is bloody awful? And when I say awful I mean stomach turning and absolutely horrible!! When posed with the question ‘Did you enjoy the food?’ are you suppose to say “No, it was bloody awful, I think I am going to be sick” or simply politely say “yes, delicious, Thank you”

How about when you are consoling a friend and they ask “Did I do the right thing dumping Jimmy.” You will find yourself saying something like “Oh yes. It’s totally for the best. The guy was not good enough for you. Good riddance to bad news!!” While in the back of your mind you are thinking “I love Jimmy, my friend is a fool.” But you’re not going to tell your friend “no, you have made a terrible mistake. That was your future husband right there!!”

Imagine you’re at a friend’s house for the first time and they are giving you the grand tour. Along the way you notice the horrific pink walls lined by a blood red carpet. One room after another looks like something Hugh Hefner would have abandoned 20 years ago. You do a lot of nodding, and humming as you complement how “Beautiful’ the house looks or comment on how they have done such a ‘good job’ with everything. Cue the car ride back whereby you are slating everything about the house and coming to the conclusion that your friends are in fact, mad. This scenario probably involved several lies in a row. One for every room of the house!! At this point I have already broken the rule of lying over and over.

So what do we do? Keep things the way they are? I suppose a few white lies are ok it’s just the big stuff we need to be careful with. I suppose what I am trying to say is that we actually need to lie in order to keep the peace and stop the world from going mad. We just need to keep quiet about certain things in order to maintain friendships, avoid conflicts and live a normal life.

People have been lying for centuries. Heck, politicians even get paid to lie on a regular basis!! A few white lies do the world good and continue to strengthen our loving bonds throughout society. The white lies protect people, so are they really lies. Are we not just bending the truth ever so slightly? Is that the same thing? Do we always need to know the truth?
I guess that rather than calling the above scenarios lying I will refer to them as reserving opinion. We are simply keeping our opinions to ourselves. So what if we think the food tastes like it has been regurgitated? So what if we think our friend has made a mistake over a boyfriend or their house looks like the Fun House at Flamingo Land? Do we really need to tell these people our ‘opinions?’ The answer is no!!

At this point we haven’t committed any crimes we have just kept the peace, and everyone is living happily in peace and harmony. That is what works best. The lies that break this bond are the big ones!! You know the type. The ones where we are not the people withholding opinions, we are in fact the ones who are breaking promises, saying one thing and then doing another in turn risking hurting someone. There are lies that hurt and break and those that protect and strengthen.


I read an article about body language the other day and there was an interesting paragraph explaining how to tell if someone is lying or not by observing their body language. If someone is lying then they typically will look down or won’t look you directly in the eye. I personally think I am pretty good at telling if someone is lying or not. I work with 18-21 year olds so I have a lot of practice!! Trust me; I have heard every excuse in the book. From “Sorry I was late I was waiting for my laundry to finish so I had some clothes to wear” to “sorry, I didn’t get any of the 16 texts you sent me so I didn’t know I was suppose to work.”

Sometimes honesty is simply the best policy. As someone who is a little more seasoned these days I can say that I respect honesty. I want things to be clear and concise. It doesn’t matter what it is. Being caught or catching someone in a lie is just embarrassing and it makes the situation worse. Be grown ups but be smart grown ups. The trick is to be able to distinguish between reserving opinon and actually telling a lie. Don't tell lies that will hurt someone or lies that you would not want to hear from someone else. I guess we all need guidance from time to time.


Wouldn’t it be great if there was a book that listed all the lies that were allowed and all the lies that were not? Well, since that has me thinking I will start my own list and I will encourage anyone reading to add to it

Remember the following sayings and you will be on easy streets

There is no dress on this green earth that will make you Look fat honey!
The food was delicious, thank you!
Your baby is beautiful.
I love my job!! Always have and always will!!
I only had one beer I promise
She’s a dog compared to you sweetheart!!
We had a great time, thanks for inviting us
Your dog is really friendly. Look at them jumping up at me like that!!
Your kids are just great!!

Always Take the Weather With You!!!

I love the transition from colder to warmer climes!! In fact, I find it quite amusing!!! As humans we adapt to all kinds of different situations. If it rains we erect our circus tent-like umbrellas to stave off unfriendly rain. We even offer shelter to our fellow man if they don't have this beautiful invention. When it gets dark we lock our doors, draw our curtains, and always make sure to park our cars under a street light. We just know the car will magically be safe under the luminous night.

There is one thing though that really gets me giggling and thats when the weather starts to get a little warm. Notice that I said 'a little warm'. For most people the very sight of the sun brings about immediate panic, excitement and indecision. Can I dig out the bermuda shorts? Do I finally get to rock those sandals my Mom bought me last winter? For most, the indecisivness is all too much to bare. One can spot all kinds of fashion faux pas. The geeky and confused Argyle socks with sneakers look, or maybe the boybandish jeans with a vest look perhaps? Either way, not until its absolutley scalding hot can we be clear on what we should and shouldn't be wearing. I myself am not to be excused from all of this weather talk.

I have fallen victim to this weather bug like the rest of us. You may have spotted me standing at a bus stop in my shorts and vest combo freezing myself to death. Nothing that a little jogging on the spot or a couple of star jumps didn't fix though. Maybe you saw me running back from the pub in monsoon-like weather because I just didnt foresee such an event occuring. Afterall, it was sunny when I left the house. Note to self-Don't run in flip flops. Especially in monsoon-like weather!!!

There's another side to this however. Sometimes its warmer than we thought!! One hears all day just how hot it is "Oh, I didn't expect this today"!!! "It's too bloody hot", or " The polo neck sweater was a mistake, ive lost about a stone in sweat!!" "I can't breath. I wish it wasnt so hot"
There's nothing quite like the feeling of beads of sweat running down your legs under the thick blue levi jeans you chose to wear the morning of Britain's worst heatwave since before the war!!!
The deafening sounds of your mates yelling to "Roll the windows down" in the car because its "Like a bloody oven" in there!!!

The heat is so much to bare some guys even shave their heads because all of a sudden it just too hot for hair!! What an inconvenience!! There are of course some real Die Hards!! Hot or not as long as there is sun they will be out in gardens across the world trying to get some color!!! We cover ourselves in all kinds of greasy products and lotions just trying to absorb some of the suns tanning rays. "make me brown" or "I just want a nice glow" are common terms overheard over the garden fences!! Of course the effects the following day are often met with dissapointment. "Get the Bloody aftersun out im burnt and im peeling"!!! or "I think I overdid it, I can't bend down to tie my shoelaces today"
Either way, we will continue to misjudge the weather. I will of course always be a victim but always be someone who can laugh about it. So be proud of who you are!!! If its hot then take a pair of scissors and cut the legs off your jeans!!! If its hot then please complain about it all day long but please just wait until its hot!!!!


There's a great lyric from an Oasis song that goes "Wrap up cold when it's warm outside" I love this line as it reminds me of my personal view about our very weird obsession with transition and indecision. Its unavoidable people!!

The Mad Scientist!!

I want everyone to think back to High School for a moment. Do you remember those science classes where we got to play with bunsen burners, test tubes and all kinds of bright colored chemicals? Pretty cool wasn't it? We got to do something a little different. We were left to be responsible and make decisions, come up with a hypothesis, analyze data and wore cool lab coats allowing us to be mad scientists for an hour or so!!

Decision-making is something we deal with every second of our lives. My science classes offered me with an opportunity to make decisions in the form of a responsible adult. This was serious stuff!!! There I was, sitting by an open flame, with all kinds of distractions and thoughts going through my head. Should I explore science or follow the rules in a safe and adult fashion?
The reason why I am harping on about science is because one day in class a friend of mine (who will not be named-but he hailed from Scotland) decided to drink the contents of one of the test tubes. I cannot remember what it was but it certainly wasnt a good thing. He was ok by the way but I think had a bit of a belly ache!!

I refused the temptations of science and pretty much followed the rules!! This got me thinking about the decisons that I now make in my life regarding the temptations of science. Chemicals are all around us. They are in everything!! Especially our food!! Foods are riddled with all kinds of chemicals these days so everytime we eat certain food we are in theory drinking a little bit of the contents of the test tube

We are now faced with a choice. Do we all drink the test tube of unknown chemicals like my Scotish friend or do we take a step back, analyze what we are dealing with and then make a scientific and adult decison? I go with the later part of this comment!!

Adjectives to describe the majority of today's food: Modified, mass produced, unhealthy, fattening.........life threatening

We know that there are dangers to many things that we consume on a daily basis. Take smoking for instance. If you smoke you are polluting your body with chemicals that will ultimately kill you. Fact. Food is now right up there with smoking!! You are probably thinking 'what a ridiculous thing to say"!!! I say "not really". Food is killing us. Fast food=Fast life. Unhealthy food=unhealthy life

Food companies will get rich from producing food products that are the evil twin of the real thing. The wolves in sheeps clothing. The devils on our shoulders!! The food money men just like the cigarette money men will stop at nothing to promote their product. They want to sell their product and will say anything to do so. But who is really to blame?? Again, we can choose not to drink the chemicals!!

Its time to be High school students again!! Its time to put the lab coats back on and come to a scientific conclusion. If we are putting this rubbish into our bodies what good can come of that? I conclude that we need to get back to basics. Buy organic food that is free of chemicals. Support your local farmers by buying fresh produce. Read the labels on food before you buy it. Be scientists!!!Your health and your children's health should be your number one priority. Take a few minutes to learn more about healthy eating.

Stay safe, eat well
Thank you for reading this weeks post on the Glass Onion
Take care
Jonny

Music makes the World Go Round

Music can change everything!! There you go!! There's my statement. Whether you believe me or not I am absolutley convinced that music can and does in fact make the world go round!!

Music alter's our moods, and is all around us like a constant celebration of life. It reminds us of a time when things were perfect and allows us to suspend all disbelief. We are all rock stars when we feel like it. Performers on our own secret stage. Our bathroom mirrors are often our greatest critic but are also our number one fan!!

Whether soothing, or aggressive, music allows us to appreciate an experience that is quite often unparralelled by anything else on God's green earth. Too much? Did I take my thoughts of music too far? Not really. Music sways us from the norm. It sometimes moulds our fashion sense, haircuts, language, and outlook on life. Am I a hippie you might ask? No, just open minded. The diversity of music is a direct representation of the human exsitence and it certainly is a common language.

Ever heard of a fella called Elvis Prestley? I thought you might. How about James Brown? Have you ever sang along to Tom Petty's "FreeFalling' with extra umph? Danced arm in arm with someone to 'Unchained Melody'? What about a little air guitar behind closed doors? Don't be ashamed!! It's ok!! If you have ever indulged in something along those lines then you have been officially touched by the power of music! Music is in us all. It is intertwined within the fabric of every life on this planet. It comforts us, cheers us up, and heck if I actually was a hippie (which I might be) I would take this time to say something really out there and spacey. I might get carried away in some kind of 'Woodstock-esque' Haze'. But I will refrain!! No I won't...yes I will

Music is permanent and never leaves us. Even when the music stops we can still hear it in our heads and in our hearts. Its a memory of yesterday and a vision of a day to come. It helps us find our voice, and gather our thoughts. It brings people together, it motivates us and in turn brings us back down to earth. Music is present when we make mix tapes for those that we love to express our feelings. Music is present to celebrate a life,or to say goodbye. It is ever present when uniting two people who want to spend the rest of their lives together. Sound the violins, bang the drums, strum the mighty guitar, keep listening to, and embracing all the beautiful music. It will make a difference in some way you just don't realize it yet.


John Lennon's 'Imagine' brought the world together!! It signifies an image of peace, unity, and love. Alternatively the power of music has also divided people. National Anthems have separated good people and strengthened barriers such as the Berlin Wall. Music however, even helped bring down that very wall and for this point I must include a disclaimer


While I am mentioning the Berlin Wall and we are of course talking about music, I would like to take this opportunity to mention that even though David Hasselhoff was asked to perform as the wall was ripped down, his music seems to be ONLY enjoyed in Germany. Elsewhere his drinking skills or lack there of carry his fame!! There's a fine line between great music and short term entertainment. As mere mortals we usually cannot differentiate this until we get a little older and wiser!!! One thing that is undeniable though is the fact that music was playing when this incredible event took place.Anyway I digress.

That's music for you!! It comes in all forms and after all it is a matter of taste but I guess it all counts!!!

Is anyone convinced yet? We are all composers in our own right. A simple song can start or end something just as quickly. We take music with us where ever we go. Songs carry specific importance from political awareness, stories of peace, to pop songs sung by young girls that end up shaving their heads in public because it was all so much fun. Men who should clearly have stook to driving talking cars and walking around a beach wearing red swimming shorts getting in on the act. There's an audience for everyone but most importantly of all we are all our own audience and music is always on show.